17 May 2024 Patient and Family Stories

A tale of two sisters, Sophie Turnbull explains how we cared for her beloved sister Laura

As a charity we support life in every way possible and that includes giving vital support to those relatives or friends of people that are going through a grieving process. Our amazing bereavement counselors work hard to support those who are experiencing grief. 

Sophie Turnbull has recently gone through that process after the death of her sister Laura who we cared for in 2023. She died in January 2023 at the age of 35 in the comfort of her mum's house.

Living in Kirkheaton, Sophie was already aware about the work we do to support people in Kirklees living with a life limiting illness. However it wasn't until the last month of Laura's life where she saw first hand the care and support we give to people. 

On that difficult time in the Turnbull family's life, Sophie said: “Laura had been diagnosed with breast cancer eight years ago in 2015. Following her diagnosis she went through chemotherapy, radiotherapy and surgery. The treatment was strong and so she lost all of her hair. Following further surgery in 2017 she was given the all clear as much as she could be. The treatment had done a good job. She then decided to go live in India to be a veterinary nurse. Laura just loved animals. 

“Whilst out there she decided to adopt a street dog called Toby. Whilst caring for him she was getting these pains in her back, so she went to get scanned and unfortunately the cancer had returned in 2019. Laura rushed home leaving everything behind to get treatment once more. She made sure the dog was flown over here, but devastatingly the dog died after six months due to cancer. We as a family were obviously really upset about that due to the context of everything, however we all believe that without Laura not getting that dog, she would have never gone to get checked out.” 

As Laura returned to England in 2019, just a year later the country was sent into lockdown due to the COVID-19 pandemic. Although in the lockdown situation, Laura was still receiving vital treatment for her cancer. 

Sophie explained: “Throughout the pandemic things were hard because we all had to live separately, the treatments were meant to stop the cancer growing. However due to the form of cancer she had it was really aggressive. Laura didn't have a partner so what she did was adopt another dog, a Romanian street dog called Kobi and he's still in the family today. She loved him to bits and he kept her company in all that period which was amazing.

“Eventually Laura's treatment stopped working and the cancer spread in her bones and to her liver. All through that period she was being supported by The Kirkwood. We can't thank The Kirkwood enough for how they supported Laura and us as a family.” 

One of Sophie's abiding memories of Laura was just how much of a great person she was. 

She said: “Laura was my best friend, I was really lucky to have such an amazing sister. She was an amazing person, a free spirit who liked to travel. I miss her and think about her all the time. One of the last memories of her is that during the month before she died, me, my mum and Laura all sat in Krakow, Poland drinking mulled wine at a Christmas market because that's what Laura wanted to do.” 

Before Laura’s death she had written down a bucket list of things she never got to complete in her life. Whilst at her funeral, family and friends were each given one thing off of the bucket list to complete. 

On this idea, Sophie commented: “When Laura knew she was going to die, she wrote quite a lot of things down. There was a long list of requests for the funeral. It was a celebration of her life. It had a bit of an Indian theme because she'd lived in India and she wanted everyone to complete her bucket list. So people took one of the things on the list away to complete. They ranged from owning a nice fancy pair of shoes or completing a marathon to drinking a shot of whiskey in the most remote Irish bar in the world, which I think is in Nepal.

“I recommend everyone do it, she has about 50 things on her list and whenever anyone ticks one off it reminds us of Laura.”

Finally Sophie talked about why she felt she needed to access our bereavement and counseling sessions following Laura's death. Sophie explained how helpful she found the counseling despite not thinking it was for her originally. 

She said: “At the beginning of my grieving process. I didn't feel counseling was for me. When Laura was unwell I got good at pushing my emotions to one side and concentrated on how others were feeling. That meant when I went back to work and everyone else was just going on as normal, I felt pressured to be normal too. I kept feeling like I should be OK when I really wasn't. I am a teacher too which is a high pressure job and you don't get time to think to yourself about things. 

“In the end it was actually really important that I did come and get the counseling, because I think it would have surfaced in a negative way later on in my life if I hadn't had it because you can only suppress your emotions so much. Talking to Tracy meant I could tell her everything I was thinking and feeling whilst in a safe, quiet and controlled space. 

“I think The Kirkwood is really important to the Kirklees community and a charity me and my family can't thank enough for all the support they have given us.”