16 Jan 2026 Patient and Family Stories

Wren and Ella’s Story

When Ella talks about Wren, everything comes back to love. A love built over eleven years, rooted in friendship, deepened by commitment, and sustained through one of the most difficult periods of their lives. 

For Wren (55) and Ella (47), their journey as a transgender couple has always been defined by love and resilience. But recently, that strength has been tested in ways they never expected. When Wren began to notice symptoms that something wasn't quite right, persistent headaches and a sudden, confusing struggle with words they were easy to dismiss at first. That changed on 2nd December. After being taken to Pinderfields Hospital, a scan identified a mass on the left side of Wren’s brain, leading to the devastating diagnosis of grade four brain cancer

The news was devastating. The couple were told that the tumour was inoperable, and Wren’s condition has deteriorated rapidly. It quickly became clear that she needed round the clock care.

With the couple living in Kirklees, a referral was made to The Kirkwood for Wren to speak with one of its Specialist Palliative Care Nurses. Within two days, Wren was admitted to the In-Patient Unit. 

“I couldn’t believe how quickly it all happened,” Ella says. “At a time when everything felt out of control, The Kirkwood stepped in with calm, reassurance and compassion.”

Although Ella had some awareness of The Kirkwood through its charity shops and community presence, nothing prepared her for the reality of the care they would receive.

Wren was initially reluctant to come into the hospice. Like many people facing the end of life, she wanted to remain at home. However as her condition progressed so quickly, it became clear that the level of care she needed could not be provided there.

“It was such a hard decision,” Ella explains. “But once we arrived, I knew it was the right one. Wren is comfortable, cared for, and surrounded by kindness.”

For Ella and Wren, being a transgender couple is something to be proud of and they are grateful to The Kirkwood staff for the love and respect they have been shown. 

“From the moment we arrived, we were treated with absolute dignity,” says Ella. “The nursing staff have been amazing with us. They've treated us like any other patient. It's a very family orientated atmosphere here, unlike being in a hospital. 

The Kirkwood nursing team took time to understand Wren and Ella and the circumstances they currently find themselves in. Ella said: “It’s not just about the medical care we've received. The staff here have cared for us in exactly the right way.”

Ella describes the atmosphere with The Kirkwood as completely different from hospital care. Less clinical, more human. Care extends not only to the patient, but to those who love them.

“They look after us both. You notice the little things, like staff and volunteers getting us a drink, a meal, a quiet check-in, or offering counselling support. All these things matter more than people realise.”

Among the most poignant moments of Wren and Ella’s time at The Kirkwood will be their upcoming handfasting ceremony. An ancient pagan ritual of binding hands together, it will symbolise a commitment that has remained unbroken through every challenge the couple have faced together. It is a moment they had hoped to share years ago, only to be held back by the pandemic and the unpredictability of life. Their time at The Kirkwood has provided the space to finally make it a reality.

“To be able to do this now, here, with the support of The Kirkwood, means everything to us,” Ella says. “I've never thought of marriage as a piece of paper. It’s about love and choosing each other, no matter what.”

The speed of Wren's illness has been devastating for everyone who loves her: “We both have our parents and other people around us. We are just devastated with Wren's illness.” 

Ella will be forever grateful for the compassion shown by The Kirkwood team: “I supported The Kirkwood before, but being here has changed everything. The care, the humanity and the inclusiveness is inspiring. This place doesn’t just care for people at the end of life. It honours them.”

For Ella and Wren, The Kirkwood is more than a place of care. It has been a place where their love has been recognised, their identities respected, and their relationship honoured, which has made a real difference during the most difficult times of their lives.

Knowing that Wren is being cared for with dignity, understanding and kindness has brought comfort for Ella and their families in the midst of heartbreak.

The Kirkwood are here for anyone affected by any life limiting illness, irrespective of gender, race, religion or sexual orientation. Whoever you are, we’re here for you.